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Youth Stories | Hui's Writing

I feel...

The item below is reproduced exactly as written. — Ed.

I feel really bored and angry. My heart is broken and my life has fallen apart. I wonder how something can repair this wound that lys in my heart. I'm really depressed. Sitting in a room all alone. Everything inside of me is about to explode. I feel miserable. My family members abandoned me. Its hard my friend Shirtey left me. And all I have is my sister. No one cares anymore. My mom doesn't come see me regularly like other people's parents. Some of my friend's parent visit them everyday, yet mine barely now. I haven't heard from my dad and mom in a long time. I haven't seen my brother in a year, I haven't seen my other brother in months.

Life is so depressing. My boyfriends somewhere in an unknown world. I haven't heard from him in a long time. My homies also abandoned me. I no longer have anyone except a couple of friends. I want to chang this life around except how...I can't bring a brother back out from the Hall. He's been charged as an adult. Maybe 8 or 9 years until I see him again. Why is my life filled with so much misery?

Is there a lesson to be taught more than I've learned? Why? Why! Is this a clue telling me that Cinderalla has or is gonna meet prince charming or is the Prince going to get kissed by the princess? My main concern is why? Why is this happening to me? I know I've commited a crime, but this punishment is way beyond the border lines. I got sentenced to 210 days and now! It seems like I'm getting sentenced with more than the Judge gave me.

My main question is why? Why is it happening to me? By coincidence or do things happen there are meanings for happening? Why? Why? Why? The time I spendin here is really long yet why so much time. I ran a good program, but yet I don't get anything for it. I might as well just give up & do bad. I'm a team leader, yet no one listens. They always ignore me. Are they just ignorant people? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why me? 


Image and text: Born, Not Raised: Voices from Juvenile Hall by Susan Madden Lankford.